127.
artist:Dixie chicks
album:wide open spaces
if you were to ask me what one thing i crave more than anything else in the world right now, id tell you quite simply that i need wide open spaces. the lyrics to this song really hit home for me; i can absolutely understand where the writer is coming from. i really need to get my shit together enough to leave home and see what happens. who knows? maybe i do strike out? maybe i succeed? what i do know is that whatever happens, it'll be something, which is more than i can say for myself right now.
I'm not sure whats going on with me, but i haven't been right for a few days. i kind of feel like my heart is going to explode out of my chest and that everything that i know is wrong. i think maybe this is what a crazy person feels like. maybe I'm going crazy. maybe the stress is getting to me. i don't know.
as of June 15th, i will be unemployed with no income until September rolls around. i am looking for a job but nothing has come up yet, and I'm starting to get nervous. I'm trying to figure out what the next step is at this point. i really thought id be in Nashville by now, but i am not, and I'm thinking i don't know how much i still want to go down there.
when i was driving and listening to this CD, all i could think about was how awesome change would be...I'm generally not a big fan of change, but at this present moment i think id embrace it as it comes along, because change is what got me out of a crappy situation in September and change can be good sometimes, even if it is scary.
i don't know. i don't know what is going on. i guess I'm starting to realize I'm hanging on to a lot of things that aren't worth keeping around. it sucks.
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